Intention
This blog post will delve into the core reasons behind challenging behaviors in children, equipping parkour coaches with a deeper understanding and compassion. Learn how to build nurturing relationships, manage groups effectively, and create an empowering environment for young trainees. Enhance your coaching techniques and ensure every session is a positive experience for both you and your students.
The Challenge: Assumed Inadequacy and its impact
Every coach will, at some point, come across a child who struggles with feelings of assumed inadequacy. Unlike attention-seekers, these children exhibit patterns of non-participation, fueled by low self-esteem. The ripple effects of such behavior can lead to a stagnant learning environment, with the coach often feeling despair, inadequacy, and hopelessness. The challenge intensifies when the child's reluctance affects the overall dynamic of the team or class, causing the coach to question their own abilities.
Why Coaches React the Way They Do
To alleviate the perceived inadequacies and to maintain the flow of the class, coaches might instinctively respond by:
Doing tasks for the child: Taking over tasks the child avoids, hoping it will motivate them.
Offering excessive help: Over-assisting in an attempt to boost the child's confidence.
Ignoring the reluctance: Sometimes choosing to overlook the child's hesitance, hoping it will resolve itself.
While stemming from a place of concern or a perceived barrier for connecting with this type of student, these reactions can paradoxically perpetuate the child's feelings of worthlessness and reaffirm their beliefs of assumed inadequacy.
The Vicious Cycle
Reacting to the child's behavior without grasping the underlying motivations can inadvertently reinforce their self-deprecating beliefs. The progression can quickly become entrenched: the child feels inadequate → the coach, wanting to shield and help, intervenes protectively → this only confirms the child's doubts, leading to continued non-participation → the child becomes even more reliant on the coach for validation and assistance → consequently, the child shies away from challenges, fearing failure. This cycle not only entraps the child in their narrative of inadequacy but also risks the coach buying into this story, potentially leading them to unintentionally give up on the student. It's vital to break this cycle early on. Celebrating even the tiniest successes can ignite a spark of self-belief in the child. By actively including them in group activities and consistently motivating them, a coach can gradually shift their perspective. It's crucial to differentiate between providing special services that cater to their perceived inadequacy and carving out specific moments that allow them to explore their interests and strengths. The latter can be a powerful tool in instilling confidence and helping them feel valued and capable.
What's Driving the Behavior?
Children who consistently avoid participation often harbor deep-seated beliefs that drive their behavior:
Fear of Inadequacy: "I'm incapable, so it's better not to try."
Value in Dependency: "I matter when others do things for me."
These beliefs echo a profound need for validation and a fear of failure. Recognizing that the core of the issue is not laziness but a protective mechanism against potential failure can change the coaching approach. No one likes to fail and Parkour Classes are physically and socially risky for the average Roblox enthusiast.
Empathetic Responses: Coaching Strategies that Address the Root Cause: (Expand)
Resources
Resources for Head Coaches Head Coach: The Unsung Hero The Importance of Non-Verbal Communication How to Handle Discipline in a Parkour Gym
Four Types of Common Misbehavior Undue Attention Power Revenge Assumed Inadequacy
Communication Skills for Coaches First Step Understanding Transparent Communication Clean Slate Listening Sincere Sharing Powerful Requests Trustworthy Promises Expressing Commitment Generous Invitations
Disclaimer & Attribution:
The content within this resource is inspired by Rudolf Dreikurs’ 1960s model on misbehaving children. The application, examples, and perspective shared are also informed by two decades of personal experience as a Parkour Instructor. While Dreikurs' foundational principles guide the understanding, the interpretations, applications, and nuances presented here are unique to the lens of parkour coaching.
This work, supplemented with personal insights and experiences, is shared under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. This means you are free to use, share, and adapt this content, but must provide appropriate attribution, not use it for commercial purposes, and share any derivative works under the same or similar license.
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